Today I will discuss about his secret obsession. how to activate his male ego to make winning your love an irresistible challenge.
He doesn’t really want the perfect woman he wants these three things from you instead how much time do you spend trying to be the kind of woman you think men want if you’re like most women it’s a lot you spend all this time making yourself look sexy and attractive all this time presenting yourself as fun interesting worldly and not needy in the slightest.
You spend all this time showing him just how good you’d be for him how amazing his future would be if he chose you as the woman by his side and it doesn’t work it never works why do you work so hard and the guy in your life just takes you for granted if he even notices you at all it’s probably because he’s immature right .
He can’t recognize a good thing until it’s gone or maybe it’s because you’ve been doing all the work for him if he doesn’t work for your relationship.
He won’t value it fact what men value most are those things they have to work hard to get hand a man a college diploma and he won’t value it as much as if he’d had to put in years of study and effort to earn it hand a man the perfect girlfriend and he won’t value her as much as if he’d had to woo her for weeks just to get her to go out with him.
This is why playing hard-to-get works but as you’ve probably already noticed there’s a big problem with playing hard-to-get that strategy stops working.
Once he’s actually got you something happens when guys decide they’ve won you it’s almost like they think game over their minds are already on their next challenge what is going on and how can you stop it from wrecking your relationship.
It’s not just you all women experience this that’s why they ask for help many women give up on love they never let themselves get too close to a man for fear of scaring him off but other women try a different approach they get help relationship coach James Bower as one of the people.
They turn to he noticed that many clients were coming to him complaining about guys who were blowing hot and cold everything would be going great and then it was like something would change overnight a guy who’d been warm affectionate and interested would suddenly become distant he’d no longer have any time for her .
He wouldn’t smile in greeting he’d stop making eye contact his kisses were brusque wanting to help his clients.
James investigated and what he discovered made sense of everything he knew why these men were backing away.
He knew what they needed and what they weren’t getting it didn’t come down to anything wrong with these women ratherit all came down to something.
He called the hero instinct most women do something that drives men away without ever realizing it one of the most wonderful things about women as how naturally caring they are look at you .
You’re always there for your guy you look after him you always make time for him you’d do anything for him you never realize that in the process you’re actually taking something away from him.
You’re taking away his purpose you see he wants to be your hero he doesn’t want you to be his hero .
Men love heroes look at how many grown men are still fascinated by MarvelComics and superhero movies, every man on earth from the time .
He was a boy dreamed of growing up to be the kind of hero who would save the world and get the girl at the same time.
Most men don’t get to indulge their world-saving side in their nine-to-five jobs circumstances don’t call for them to ripoff their corporate ties and spring into action revealing their Superman side maybe they can’t save the world.
But they can still get the girl getting the girl as a worthy challenge for an ordinary guy with the heart of as uper hero it takes superhuman confidence superhuman charm superhuman immunity to pain .
Now all he needs to find us a girl who needs a hero do you need a hero. let me guess that’s not you you’re strong ,you’re independent, you can fix a leaky faucet you can drive a stick-shift you can take care of yourself.
You’re never going to make that Jerry Maguire mistake of looking for a man to complete you instead you have a lot to offer a man you’re generous kind loving giving to a fault all you want us to find a man who’s willing to receive all .
You have to give and that’s why heroes aren’t showing up in your life that’s why you’ve ended up with so many takers instead guys who take everything you have and leave you high and dry if you want a hero then you need to advertise for one.
Here’s how three ways you can invite a hero into your life starting today 1 ask a guy for help ask him for advice on buying a new computer .
Ask him to listen to that weird rattling sound that started up in your carask him to reach something on the top shelf then thank him warmly with a great big smile of appreciation no that doesn’t make you needy.
It makes you a woman with space for a man in her life to take pleasure in male company guy slove women who appreciate men for just being men so what if his apartment as ashrine to sports so what if he spends hours on his fantasy football team .
So what if his idea of a clean shirt as the one with the fewest wrinkles he’s a guy it’s ok you don’t need him to be more like you because you’ve got the feminine side of the gender equation covered 3 let him earn your respect superheroes love challenges they don’t want to be given a gold medal just for showing up.
They don’t want your love handed to them on a plate they want to earn it there’s one thing they crave even more than a woman’s eternalen during love a challenge .
so give him opportunities to prove himself you don’t have to do the work of winning him over sit back relax and allow him the pleasure of winning your admiration keep learning if that sounds like fun to you .
